Widows and widowers often find themselves in a very unpredictable love triangle. They are finally ready to move forward with a new partner in their lives but they know deep down in their hearts that they still love the person they lost.
Often, people keep these feelings to themselves because they want to live a full life with a new companion. However, they cannot deny the experience they are feeling. They are usually forced to suppress it. Susan Warner is going to explore this topic in today’s podcast.
Susan is Suddenly Single
Episode 14 - Can You Love Two People At The Same Time?
Getting married again after being widowed is a controversial topic. It’s an interesting, complex decision. What’s important is whether a new marriage is right for everyone. It’s a new world out there and the reasons why people hurried to get married again years ago, after losing a spouse or divorce, do not necessarily apply today. Let’s have this discussion…
Susan is Suddenly Single
Episode 13 - Is A New Marriage Right For Everyone Who Has Lost A Spouse?
Why do some men and women harbor guilt about moving on after losing a spouse? That’s a topic worth exploring because there are too many people crippled by it. Not everyone needs or wants a new partner after losing the one they had, but those that pursue often speak about managing their guilt. We are addressing those who are paralyzed by emotions that prevent new relationships. It’s very important to understand the dynamics of guilt so widows and widowers or those divorced can make meaningful and rational decisions for the rest of their lives minus the guilt.
This is going to be one of Susan’s most difficult podcasts to produce. It’s about the death by suicide of her son David. It’s one thing to discuss moving forward after experiencing the death of her son and then her husband Michael. It’s totally another to discuss losing a child.
August 18th is the FIFTH anniversary of her son’s death. Talking about David is Susan’s way of keeping him close and very much a part of her life.
He was a good son, smart, charismatic, kind and loving. David was 4 weeks from his wedding.
Susan’s words will probably resonate with all of us on many levels. Life is hard, but Susan’s mission is to make it the best possible one for herself and those in her orbit.
If you are like Susan, you take your friendships seriously. Your friends can be like family to you. You feel like your life is safe and secure because you can count on a circle of friends for support. Different friends play different roles in your life. You do the same for them.
Then, your world gets turned upside down when you lose a spouse or a child or get divorced or end a relationship. The delicate balance in friendships can also be disrupted. All of a sudden you start to see cracks in some friendships and strong new foundations in others. And in a perfect storm, relatives are also dear friends, and the circle continues. Today she has mixed the old with the new and have found a really wonderful orchestra of relationships.
Our last podcast gave you insight into Susan’s very difficult journey. She is quick to affirm that this was a rough road fashioned with an over-arching desire to move forward. But it wasn’t easy. Susan firmly believes that people do not have to get caught in a cycle of profound sadness and depression if they discover that there is more out there to live for.
Even though there have been many dark days since her son and husband’s deaths, Susan decided early on that she was going to try to live her best possible life. She comes from a long line of resiliency and that pointed her to a “Chapter Two.” One of the ways she made that happen was by planning ahead and forming routines and disciplines that kept her safe, secure and fulfilled.
In all of our past podcasts, Susan Warner has talked about moving forward, not beyond, when you lose someone you love. To many of Susan’s followers, her confidence and desire to live the best possible life, may seem like she possesses an inner strength that they do not. She stresses that never in this journey has it been entirely easy or uncomplicated.
It’s time that she talked about her past, and what it was like in the early days after the death of her son and then, soon after, the death of her husband. What was she thinking in those days, how did she feel, where did she go, how did she conduct herself?
This information will give her loyal listeners a true understanding of who Susan is, her struggles and triumphs. This podcast will explain the past and give listeners a lens to the journey: the pain, the path to recovery from loss and her transformation. It can serve as a road map to those that have endured and suddenly find themselves afloat alone. This information can be an inspirational exploration to find contentment and personal happiness.
She says, “There are dark times and sad times, but, in wanting to go on, the revenge is to live my best life.” Susan comments, “I made the conscious decision to live and to move forward.” She knew there was another chapter, a right turn. Chapter 2.
Self-image, projection of one’s self and caring can promote better mental health. You get what you give and being your best person will promote better responses from the world at large. Smile, give directions, be aware of the person that you are. Take pride in conquering the challenges that make you more self assured, accomplished and comfortable.
Susan is Suddenly Single
Episode 7 - Laugh At Yourself - It Is So Much Easier Than Crying
Silver Lining. Very few people who are widowed would ever admit that they can experience a new found independence in their solo life. Susan Warner talks about this repressed emotion because everyone needs to understand it’s quite normal to suddenly realize, “You answer to no one and you may be able to enjoy it. There is nothing to feel guilty about. This is all part of the healing process.”
Susan quickly points out that she would do anything to bring back her husband and live the life she had before, but she knows that’s not going to happen. So now, she leads a life on her own terms. “I have loved and I have lost. I will do what I want, when I want, with whom I want.”
This episode is profound for both widowed and divorced people of any age. Susan leads you through a myriad of emotions that have a silver lining for those who want an independent, fuller, and self-reliant next chapter.
Susan opens up about the importance of conversation and verbal exchange in relationships over 50. Not just the obvious, but talking about finances, friendships, likes and dislikes and even in the bedroom. Dating after 50 does not need to be defined by texts and emails – in fact, she believes it is most successful when the lost art of communication is used. Say what you mean and say what you want.